Conference Championships- Super Bowl- Roll Credits

  CONFERENCE CHAMPIONSHIP

                   NINERS AT FALCONS

THE CASE FOR ATLANTA: They played a game just like this one two days ago and won! Seriously, is there any real difference between San Francisco and the team that Atlanta just dominated for three quarters? If the Falcons handled Seattle, there’s no reason why they can’t handle San Francisco. Atlanta still gets to play this game in the Georgia Dome, where Matt Ryan is 33-5 in his career. Julio Jones and Roddy White get to match up against cornerbacks that are not named Brandon Browner or Richard Sherman this week, so that’s a huge plus. Atlanta is a big fan of spreading teams out and picking on the matchup disadvantage, which is what Green Bay was able to do with some degree of success in the Divisional Matchup. Plus, the Falcons seem to have rediscovered their running game. Michael Turner was all but left for dead as an elite running back, but he did average seven yards per carry last week. However, the biggest reason to like the Falcons is because nobody believes in them. Both Ray and Matt were drinking the “Matt Ryan choked away a lead” Kool-Aid. You know, because Matt Ryan really sucks at playing the cornerback position. Even after last week’s victory over the team with the best DVOA, nobody I know believes that Atlanta can win the Super Bowl (well, except for Xander from Oceanography class. If you’re right about this, then hats off to you). Odds are that at some point in your life, you’ve probably been doubted or even cheered against by somebody. Think about how you reacted to that. Oh, really? You’re gonna bet against me? Screw you, I’m doing this. Just watch. That’s how the Falcons feel right now and that’s a really, really good mentality to be in for the Playoffs.

THE CASE AGAINST ATLANTA: Their defense really isn’t that great. In terms of DVOA, Atlanta has the third worst defense out of this year’s playoff teams and by far the worst defense still remaining. 21st in defensive DVOA just isn’t good enough against a dynamic Niners’ offense. Once Russell Wilson started moving outside of the pocket and doing Russell Wilson things, the Falcons found themselves in huge trouble. There’s a reason why everybody I know loved Seattle in that game, and it’s because the Falcons just aren’t a very complete team. I live and die by the “your team needs to do two specific things really well to be a Super Bowl contender” rule, and the Falcons just don’t fit that description. The passing game fits that description somewhat, although there are other offenses in the league that clearly outclass it. And the other thing that they do well is..... wait, what is the other thing? I mean, it could very well be the running game. But after hearing week after week that Michael Turner doesn’t have it anymore, one good game isn’t going to change my mind. And most importantly, the Falcons might not be able to close games. They were up 27-7 at the beginning of the fourth quarter last week and it took a borderline miracle for them to close out a flat and severely jet-lagged Seahawks team. The phrase,“leading 27-7” and the phrase, “It’s a miracle that they won” shouldn’t be in the same paragraph when you describe a Super Bowl team.

THE CASE FOR SAN FRANCISCO They just beat the Falcons! Aren’t the Packers just a slightly better version of Atlanta? Better passing game, same unremarkable defense, nonexistent running games, and the thought of Asante Samuel having to tackle someone. Oh, wait, that last one is just Atlanta. Colin Kaepernick might already be one of the ten best QBs in the league and he’s coming off of the greatest performance by a Niners’ QB since Steve Young. San Francisco seems to have dramatically ramped up the number of zone read plays in their offensive repertoire for that Green Bay game, which really works on two levels. One: opponents don’t have a ton of film/firsthand experience with which to prepare for the zone read. Two: it’s what Colin Kaepernick is most comfortable with. The Niners have it all: a unique offense that works, a team that can do two things really well (zone read and stopping the run), three fantastic linebackers, and a “we’ve been there before” swagger that cannot be replicated by groups of players that, well, haven’t been there before. This is a Niners team that came up just barely short in 2011 and entered the season pissed off about it. Now, they’re facing the exact same situation, only with a better team and a shakier opponent. I don’t think I need to be worried about the Niners being caught flat-footed for this one.

THE CASE AGAINST SAN FRANCISCO: The whole jet-lag thing is still going to be a big factor that will end up working against the Niners. It won’t be quite as bad as it was for the Seahawks because they don’t have to do the coast-to-coast routine in back-to-back weeks, but it’s still tough. Green Bay hung with the Niners for three solid quarters by doing exactly what Atlanta bases its offense on; spread out the defense with 4+ receiver sets, identify the biggest mismatch, and pick on that matchup. San Fran’s pass defense wasn’t that great against Green Bay until the game was to the point where they couldn’t possibly consider a run. Most of the downsides to San Fran simply come from the fact that it seems too improbable to have both favorites win. I know that the previous sentence was seemingly contradictory, but weird things happen in the NFL Playoffs. What people think will happen almost never happens and ditto for what people want to happen. And right now, everybody both expects and wants a Niners-Patriots Super Bowl. 76% of people on ESPN’s SportsNation poll like the Niners in this one, even though they’re on the road and in a loud dome. I’m not as sold as that 76%.

MY PICK: This game really comes down to how much you think emotional things matter. If you’re going purely based on facts, performance, matchups, and measurables, then you’d take San Francisco. If you put tons of stock in the “Nobody Believes In Us” theory, the home team advantage, the home dome advantage, and the “They can’t possibly be as good as the Packers’ linebackers made them look” theory, then you’d lean towards Atlanta. I’m firmly in the former camp, so I’m taking the 49- ah, screw it, you only live once. I’m on the Atlanta bandwagon.

FALCONS 31, NINERS 28 L Niners 28, Falcons 24

      

RAVENS AT PATRIOTS

THE CASE FOR NEW ENGLAND: It’s not exceptionally difficult to make a case for New England here. I could probably just write, “two words, Tom Brady” and move on to the next section. And since The Bachelor is coming on in an hour, I conside- darn it, I’ve used that line too. This book needs to be over so I can try and restore some of my sanity/social life/acumen to catch up on Parks and Recreation. Like I was saying before I sidetracked myself, the case for New England is that they will be playing at home against a clearly inferior team that they should dominate on paper. Also, they’re playing at home against an inferior team. In case you didn’t catch that, they’re playing at home against an inferior team. If you were to make a T-Chart with the Pats on one side and the Ravens on the other, then list every position in the middle and assign checks to each team based on which one is better, wouldn’t the Pats have all of the check marks? Terrifying offense, an opportunistic defense, and the absolute assurance that a team will need to score thirty points or more to win are the calling cards of the Pats’ franchise. Add that to a core of players that takes the “been there before” mantra to a whole new level, and this game’s result is almost pre-ordained. Great teams take care of business. The Patriots are a great team, and the Ravens are merely a good one.

THE CASE AGAINST NEW ENGLAND: The Patriots’ secondary is just bad enough to keep things interesting. Ever since their alleged mid-season improvement, they’ve only faced two competent QBs: Colin Kaepernick and Andrew Luck. Obviously, they did well against Luck and they were awful for at least half of the game against Kaepernick. The point is: we don’t know how much or how little they’ve actually improved. Joe Flacco has been throwing the deep ball with a fairly high degree of success ever since the Playoffs started, so it’s not inconceivable that the Ravens could equalize the game with a few long touchdowns. Much like the Ravens picked on Champ Bailey over and over again during the Denver game, they might be able to repeatedly throw the ball at Alfonzo Dennard’s domain with reasonable success. Overall, the main problem with New England is that they cannot close a game. Matt still doesn’t feel comfortable with New England in the fourth quarter unless they’re up by more than two touchdowns, and neither do the majority of Pats’ fans. They were leading the Texans 38-17 in the divisional round last week, and there was a point in the fourth quarter where a Houston comeback seemed like it was not outside of the realm of possibility. And since the Ravens seem like the team of destiny; with the last second win over Denver and some linebacker guy that’s retiring (I forget his name: the cameras should really show him more), it’s REALLY not good if you can’t hold on to a fourth quarter lead. Knowing what we know about how Pats-Ravens have gone in the past, doesn’t this one have to be close at some point?

THE CASE FOR BALTIMORE: This game has all the makings of a classic upset. I don’t know if you heard by now, but Ray Lewis is retiring. That Denver game took them out of the “emotional team” role and put them firmly in the “weird things happen when this team is involved” role. After that late deep ball to Jacoby Jones, I’d believe just about any outcome for this game. That’s how you want to feel if your team is trying to pull off a big upset. Plus, don’t forget that this is a revenge game for the Ravens, a confident and tough team that has a habit of taking rivalries personally (just look at what Ravens-Steelers has escalated to). If any team in the league would totally buy into the whole, “the Pats stole the AFC Championship from us last year, they’re going to pay” mentality, it would have to be Baltimore. That’s another really positive mentality to be in if you’re looking for a big upset. I feel like the Ravens are going to be so fired up for this game that if Joe Flacco can make a deep throw or two and the special teams unit makes a big play (they’re first in special teams DVOA even after Trindon Holliday carved them up), then this is a winnable game. The Texans’ team that the Pats just ripped apart are better than Baltimore is on paper, but they didn’t have swagger. Baltimore is equal parts confident and mad. That’s not a comforting thought for New England. Oh, and Ray Lewis is retiring. Just thought you should know.

THE CASE AGAINST BALTIMORE: The fact that I couldn’t cite a single tangible reason why the Ravens could pull off an upset should be a tip-off that an upset probably isn’t happening. Every single matchup is in New England’s favor except for special teams and it’s not even close in most cases. Is there anybody on the Baltimore Ravens that would really scare the Pats that much? Maybe Torrey Smith, but even that’s a bit of a stretch. New England averaged 35 points per game this year, and Baltimore has scored that many points or more only three times this season. Plus, let’s not forget that Baltimore had to pull off a miracle pass with thirty seconds left to beat Denver. So, there.

MY PICK: PATRIOTS 38, RAVENS 21 (I hate everything right now. Just in case that wasn’t implied strongly enough.) Ravens 28, Patriots 13

PRO BOWL                             

                       Who cares?

      

SUPER BOWL

WHO DOESN’T CARE?: RAVENS VS NINERS

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Harbowl! I feel terrible about making that pun, but the NFL threatened to block the book from being published unless I made a bad joke to indicate that Jon and Jim Harbaugh are coaching against each other in the Super Bowl. By the way, did you know that Jon and Jim Harbaugh are brothers and they’re coaching against each other in the Super Bowl? I sure didn’t. Why haven’t people been playing this storyline up? I really don’t get it. Anyways, since I’m studying for mid-terms while writing this section and my capacity to find new ways to format these sections is just about backbackbackbackbackbackback gone, let me introduce you to......

SOME INTERESTING STUFF ABOUT THE 2012 SUPER BOWL

• If the Niners were to win this Super Bowl, does that set them apart as the best post-merger franchise in the NFL? They will have been to six Super Bowls and will have come away with victories in all of them. The best QB of all time (Joe Montana), the best WR of all time (Jerry Rice. No, it isn’t you, Randy Moss), one of the best defensive players of all time (Ronnie Lott), and one of the best/most historically significant head coaches of all time (Bill Walsh, the mastermind of the West Coast offense) all will have been a significant part of the San Francisco 49ers. And I didn’t even mention Steve Young (one of the ten best QBs to ever play the game), Deion Sanders (one of the top five CBs in league history), the DeBartolo ownership family (maybe the best in sports), and Candlestick Park (one of football’s iconic stadiums). (Insert sound of my brain exploding here). The fact that the Super Bowl-bound 2012 Niners might not even rank among the five best teams in Niners’ history should tell you everything you need to know. What other team can claim a legacy like that?
• It is kind of unbelievable that the Harbaughs are meeting in the Super Bowl when you consider all that it took to get there. I had been crapping on the Ravens pretty much non-stop since about Week 8 and with fairly good reason. They had just fired their offensive coordinator, they couldn’t seem to get Ray Rice involved in the offense anymore, and their rush defense was suddenly on the wrong side of awful (26th in DVOA).  Just as recently as mid-December, they seemed like the only division champions in the league that were just playing out the string until an inevitable playoff exit. They had just come off of an overtime loss to the Redskins and a mauling at the hands of the Broncos, not to mention they were about to play the December version of the Giants. And now, they’re here. One win away from the Super Bowl. Is football great or what?
• How bout Joe Flacco? In these playoffs, he has logged over 9 yards per pass, ten touchdowns, zero interceptions, a QB rating over 100, and only one instance of bad facial hair. Speaking as somebody who has always thought of Joe Flacco as the definition of an average QB (DVOA thinks that way too: 17th in the league for Flacco), his transformation into a big-play specialist over the course of these playoffs has been nothing short of amazing. In six days, I could be saying the words, “Joe Flacco, Super Bowl Champion.” Or “Joe Flacco, Super Bowl MVP.” Give it another two months, and those words could become, “Joe Flacco, the highest paid player in the league.” He’s becoming a guy that makes fans of both teams hold their breath, a QB that you want no part of in the fourth quarter, one of the most accurate deep ball throwers in the league, a proven playoff winner, and a potential Super Bowl champ. Can you ever remember a completely unremarkable QB redefining his career for the better by carrying his team to this extent in the playoffs? He’s about to be a very rich man after the contract negotiations he’s going to have this offseason.
• Hey, did you hear that Ray Lewis is retiring?
• No, seriously, I’m not kidding. Those hundred TV camera close-ups, eighty interviews, and God knows how many mentions from announcers hadn’t really clued us in yet. Or, in Dan Dierdorf’s words, I’m not so sure that Ray Lewis isn’t playing his last season. Still, even though I poke fun at how much attention the retirement tour is getting, I can’t help but be impressed by Ray Lewis’ career. When I went to the NFL Play 60 event for SIKIDS and asked defensive players of the 2012 draft class who they would want on their team (if they could only choose one), nearly every linebacker and defensive lineman answered almost immediately, “Ray Lewis.” He’ll retire after having logged thirteen seasons with at least 100 tackles, fifty combined forced fumbles and interceptions, and potentially two Super Bowl rings. He’ll also retire with the undying respect of anyone and everyone that has ever played with or against him, the knowledge that he was perhaps the most iconic defensive player in NFL history, and the prospect of becoming the signature NFL announcer when he inevitably joins Boomer, Teej, Coach, Key, and Who Cares on NFL Countdown. Not a bad career.
• The best case for the Ravens to win the Super Bowl in short: they’re the team of destiny. I wish I could find a better way to explain it to you and the Football Outsiders guys would probably have my head if I worked for them and tried to explain the Super Bowl like that. However, that’s probably what it comes down to. This is a team that supposedly missed its window of opportunity. They were too old, had too many injuries, and were too stale on offense to compete with good teams. I was out on them. My friends were out on them. Every single place of reputable info that I’ve used for this entire book was out on them. Just three weeks ago, two-thirds of SportsNation picked against them in their Wild Card game, even though they were at home and favored by seven. Nobody believed in Baltimore. And therein lies what makes them such a dangerous team. Every viable statistic and observation told them that they were done, but they didn’t care about stupid statistics and observations. Their last window to win the big one probably should have closed last year, yet they refused to believe that it had done so. They’re the 2011 Giants, only with a terrifying aspect of craziness/good karma thrown in. 996 times out of 1,000 (according to the NFL Win Probability Calculator), Baltimore loses to Denver when they’re down seven with less than a minute to go. The Ravens definitely don’t go in to Foxborough and completely derail the 2012 Pats offense (almost as good as 07, statistically speaking) if they’re not meant to win the Super Bowl. And since sports usually provides fitting endings in some way, it just seems like winning the Super Bowl would be a proper ending to Ray Lewis’ career. Has the scrappy underdog in a serious sports movie ever made it all the way to the title game.... and then lost? Wouldn’t it just feel weird if Ray Lewis’ career ended with him staring sullenly up at a scoreboard that said something like, “Niners 34, Ravens 13, 0:00, 4th quarter?” Of course it would. There’s a lot to be said for a team that comes into the big game with emotional and psychological advantages. This isn’t just a Super Bowl to Baltimore, this is the game that will end the era of Ray Lewis and begin the second chapter in Ravens’ history. San Francisco is solidly locked in as a contender for the next half-decade (at least) barring injury/colossal screw-ups. This could be Baltimore’s last chance for at least that long. The forces that change NFL history are not something I’d want working against my team in the Super Bowl. And if you felt like that last sentence was really melodramatic, then I can’t argue with you because it absolutely was.
• The weirdest thing just happened to me today. I came home after a nice long day of mid-term exams (ugh) and I decided to watch some TV. But as I went into my family room, some stranger was sitting on the couch. He claimed that he lived in my house the last time the 49ers won the Super Bowl. No, really. He watched every game from thi-no...this exact spot. Wait, I already made fun of that commercial? Darn it. I’m running out of ideas here, so cut me some slack. Thank goodness that I just have the Super Diary to do after this section and this Jabba the Hutt of a book will finally be over.
• Well, at least that last bullet point was a nice segue into talking about the Niners. And contrary to what the first 1,000 words of this feature would indicate, the record shows that there was, in fact, another team besides Baltimore involved in Super Bowl 47. The fact that Jon and Jim Harbaugh are coaching against each other in a Super Bowl (such an underrated subplot of the big game) is nothing short of amazing when you consider what Jim Harbaugh had to accomplish in order to put San Francisco in this game. People forget this now, but San Francisco was utterly hopeless before Harbaugh arrived. Their last playoff appearance and winning season in the pre-Harbaugh era happened in 2002. From that point until the Harbaugh era (so from 2003 to 2010), San Francisco had gone 46-82 and had both hired and fired four different head coaches. Over that time period, running back Frank Gore and middle linebacker Patrick Willis were the only assets the Niners had to speak of. In the timespan of one year, Jim Harbaugh and GM Trent Baalke put together a team that went 13-3 (an improvement of seven wins) and made the NFC Conference Championship. A year later, they’re playing in the Super Bowl.
• Just to hammer home how inconceivable that last point is and how well everything worked out for San Francisco, imagine that you’re a fan of a bad team. If you are, then great. If not, then just picture the last time your team was legitimately bad. Has to be 7-9 or worse. OK, now imagine that a person who had traveled two years into the future traveled back in time and told you something along these lines about your favorite team:

Hey, I just got back from the future. (Insert bad team of choice here) is playing in the Super Bowl. Not just that, but they apparently played well enough the year before that they were pretty popular Super Bowl picks in the preseason. How many players did you send to the Pro Bowl this year? Four? Well, you’ll be sending nine in just two years. Too bad they couldn’t go because they were, you know, playing in the Super Bowl. After your eighth miserable season in a row, you overhauled things in the offseason and ended up with the best coach in the league, an extremely competent GM, the most disciplined team in the league, one of the best O-Lines in the league and the toughest defense in the league. Those all come within a year of each other. The only thing your team doesn’t have is a true franchise QB. Oh, wait, yes you do, but he doesn’t start until halfway through 2012. Turns out, he was on the roster the whole time. Funny how things like this work out, huh? Oh, and you’re positioned the best out of any team in the NFL to win multiple titles in the next decade.

I mean, look at everything that just fell into place for San Francisco. A small part of you always hope that a few good picks, one coach, and a big trade can turn it all around, but deep down you suspect it’s just a pipe dream. It’s something that happens to other people’s teams, but not yours. But that’s just it. The Niners are living, breathing proof that it’s not just a pipe dream. That it can happen to anyone who plays their cards right. In order to get to the Super Bowl, the Niners brought the dream of every single sports fan to life. Does it get better than that?

• Oh, and speaking of franchise QBs, how about the weird parallels between Colin Kaepernick’s first full year as a starter and Tom Brady’s first full year as a starter? Both QBs became the starter mid-year due to injury. Both QBs probably provided the last missing piece for their respective teams to become title contenders. And both (assuming that Kaepernick’s career goes well) will be tied to their respective gutsy head coaches that stuck with them even after the guy they replaced returned to the roster. However, the QBs differ in their style of play. Enough words have already been spent in this book breaking down Tom Brady: we’ve pretty much touched on everything except the Uggs commercial. (Whoa, too soon!) But I’ve only spent a few words on Colin Kaepernick, and I can’t really divine the reason. Bill Simmons’ nickname for Kaepernick(Video Game) seems appropriate since he seems like Tecmo Bowl Bo Jackson come to life. If stat balancing weren’t as precise as it is in today’s Madden games, I could totally envision talking with my friends in twenty years about how I’d always play as the Niners just because Colin Kaepernick was unstoppable. And that’s how I feel in real life too. The Niners have designed a speed option offense with principles that go back to the original Wishbone offenses of Darrell Royal’s Texas teams. I know that they’re lining up in different formations, yet the principles (namely, put the ball on the RBs chest and then pick a key member of the defense to “read.” If he attacks the ballcarrier, keep it and off tackle. If he attacks the QB, hand it off) remain fundamentally the same. People don’t realize how difficult it is for a team to completely change its offensive philosophy mid-season. People also don’t realize how often coaches would refuse a change like this because it would be a divergence from the system that they wanted to run. It was a perfect mix of the right game-breaking QB and the right head coach that was willing to put his player’s talent over his own scheme that helped put San Francisco in the Super Bowl.
• The case for San Francisco is really easy to make. They’re the more talented team on paper by a decent margin. Baltimore hasn’t had to face a team with a good running game, and they’ve had some significant problems stopping the run this year (25th in DVOA against the run). Everyone is falling all over themselves with the “Ray Lewis retires” and “Ray Lewis PEDs” storylines and forgetting all about how the Niners are the more talented team. (QUICK SIDEBAR:Just to clarify: I think it’s plausible that Ray Lewis used PEDs, but I’m going to need to see way more physical evidence before I believe it. But once again, I digress. SIDEBAR OVER.) And as we’ve seen in the past, unheralded favorites are often very dangerous to pick against in the playoffs. They should not have any trouble dominating the line of scrimmage on both the offensive and defensive side of the football, and I don’t know how a Ravens’ D that was susceptible to Andrew Luck moving outside the pocket is going to contain Colin Kaepernick. This is a unique style of offense that they haven’t seen since their loss to Washington two months ago. Only having two weeks to prepare for an unfamiliar offensive style is more of a challenge than anyone could ever realize. That’s what San Fran’s opponents have to do every single week (and the average opponent usually gets one week instead of two to prepare). Baltimore has to stop an offense built around the speed option, something that the Ravens have seldom seen before and are poorly equipped to defend in theory. San Fran has the more talented team, the stronger team, and perhaps even the more motivated team. Other than that, I can’t see much to like about the Niners in this game.

My Pick: Niners 35, Ravens 23

          THE SUPER DIARY

6:17 This is it. After nine months of writing and the entire NFL season gone by, the 2012 NFL journey and this book comes to an end tonight. This is my last ride. I even took the liberty of spraying myself down with some deer antler.

6:19 Whoops, I’m thinking of Ray Lewis. By the way, Ray Lewis is retiring today. Just wanted to let you know.

6:22 That moment when the Newtown chorus and Jennifer Hudson performed together..... wow. Just wow. One of the most beautiful moments I’ve ever seen on TV.

6:25 Two minutes and thirty-five seconds for Alicia Keys’ rendition of the national anthem. A good twenty seconds over the 2:15 O/A mark.

6:30 And for the final time until August, I am being welcomed to the following presentation of the National Football League. Is it weird that I just got goosebumps?

6:31 And then Dad asked me immediately after my 6:30 entry, “Who’s playing?” Goosebumps gone.

6:32 HEEEEEERRRREEEEE WEEEEEEE GOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

6:35 Three and out on San Francisco’s first drive. Lots of pistol looks early on from the Niners. Could be setting Baltimore up for something later in the game. Baltimore starts at their own 48.

6:38 Great throw from Flacco to Torrey Smith on a corner post route. The Ravens now have the ball on the Niners’ 18 yard line. One thing that we haven’t heard much this week is about Torrey Smith’s story. His brother, Tevin, was killed in a motorcycle accident earlier in the season. I can’t imagine what’s going through his head as he plays in this Super Bowl.

6:41 Touchdown Baltimore! Flacco over the middle to Boldin for a thirteen yard score. Boldin just ran right up the seam and made the catch out in front of two defenders. Great route by Boldin.

6:45 OK, I just saw the GoDaddy commercial with Bar Refaeli making out with a dorky guy with glasses. And now I’ll see that image in my nightmares for awhile. Thanks GoDaddy!

6:48 Mmmmm..... nachos.

6:49 Niners are already near midfield on the strength of a twenty-plus yard catch from Michael Crabtree and a ten yard run from Gore. As I wrote that, the Niners’ O-Line pushed Baltimore’s front seven way the hell off the ball for a nice Kaepernick run. San Francisco has the ball at the Ravens’ 37. My dad is also turning into Gus Johnson over eight yard runs.

6:51 Ray Lewis has missed on two tackles so far. This zone read system forces linebackers to flow to the ball quickly, and I don’t think Ray Lewis has that speed anymore. Michael Crabtree and Frank Gore have dodged Ray Lewis tackles pretty easily so far. As I wrote that, Kaepernick fired down the field to Vernon Davis, which put the Niners on the Ravens’ 8.

6:54 The Niners’ drive stalls (SHOT!) and they are forced to kick a field goal. 7-3 Baltimore. 3:58 left in the first. Two Arnold Palmers consumed by me.

6:59 Cream. Cookie. Cream. Cookie. Cream. Cooki- SHUT UP OREO COMMERCIAL!!!

7:00 Ed Reed seems to have hurt his knee colliding with Vernon Davis.

Dan Dierdorf’s take: I’m not so sure that isn’t a big loss for the Ravens.

Actually, I don’t know what his reaction was. But I imagine it went something like that. Also, my Mom just turned to me and said, “Hey, did you know that the head coaches in this game are brothers?” Nope. No, I did not.

7:05 Joe Flacco is bagged by Ray McDonald as the first quarter comes to a close. Baltimore 7, San Fran 3, and nine unnecessary/inadvertent Gus Johnson impressions from Dad.

7:10 The Niners are already driving the ball down the field. A thirty yard pass from Kaepernick to Vernon Davis puts the Niners around midfield. Davis is really playing an integral role in this game. Baltimore’s linebackers and safeties just look slow to me, both in run defense and in the secondary.

7:13 So of course Courtney Upshaw had to cause a fumble three minutes after I wrote that. And did the Ravens recover said fumble? Of course they did. Thank you for crapping on my point, Baltimore. I’m full of vitriol tonight as usual.

7:19 Great throw from Joe Flacco to Ed Dickson. He saw Dickson on a deep crossing route and fired it out ahead of him and directly into the range of the deep safety. Dickson and the safety arrived at the ball simultaneously, and the ball was popped in to the air before Dickson grabbed it. Well done on Dickson’s part.

7:22 Touchdown Ravens! Joe Flacco to Dennis Pitta for a two yard touchdown! 14-3 Baltimore. Quote from me after the Ravens fired Cam Cameron, “Their playoff goose is cooked.” I’m an idiot. But you knew that already.

7:25 Sucky commercials so far from GoDaddy. I don’t know how they can afford to keep dropping money on Super Bowl commercials. What site do you know of that actually uses GoDaddy? Have you seen GoDaddy in any walk of your life outside of their overly sexualized commercials? I think Super Bowl commercials might account for more than fifty percent of their public exposure.

7:30 And Baltimore picks off Colin Kaepernick! He overshot Randy Moss on an out route, which led to an easy pick by Ed Reed. After the play, a fight broke out in which players had to be separated, personal fouls had to be called, and Brick killed a guy. Oh, come on, we’re late in the book and I’m only marginally funny. I had to go back to that Anchorman well at least one more time.

7:34 I just realized that ref Jerome Boger shaved his awesome mustache for tonight’s game. I find this a profoundly depressing moment. Always enjoyed the ‘stache.

7:37 IT’S A FAKE!!!

7:37 The Ravens eschew a 35 yard field goal to try a fake field goal. Justin Tucker takes off running from a direct snap and is stopped short of the first down line. Even though it didn’t work, I loved the play call. It was aggressive, bold, and clearly said, “We aren’t just the team that’s happy to be here.” Besides, the Niners ended up getting the ball deep in their own end anyways and promptly ended up going three and out. See, this is what I mean. Nobody ever wins Super Bowls with boring, by-the-book play callers as coaches. Sorry to disappoint the thirteen Jaguars fans out there.

7:43 Ravens get the ball back in great field position. This is not ending well for San Francisco.

7:48 Yep, there it is! 56 yard touchdown from Flacco to Jacoby Jones right over cornernackChris Culliver! Jones just ran a straight go route up the seam and put the nastiest double move on Culliver. It almost juked me out of my TV chair in New Jersey, so I can’t imagine what a number it did on Culliver. 21-3 Ravens with just under two minutes left to go. It seems like no weapon that the Niners are forging against the Ravens can ever prosper.

7:54 Except for Kaepernick and Delanie Walker! Beautiful throw and catch from Kaep to Walker right under the nose of Ed Reed. It was a similar throw to the one that he faced when he threw the interception to Reed: tight throw to a downfield receiver with Reed sitting over the top. This time, instead of leaving the ball high and dry, Kaepernick drove through the ball and kept it low to the ground on the body of Walker. Well done on his part.

8:00 Niners have to kick a field goal before the end of the half. 21-6 Ravens with two quarters left to go in the season. Beyonce is about to take the stage for the biggest performance of her life, and I fully intend on not watching it. Instead, I’m heading up to the kitchen for some spicy beef chili. Be back after the half.

8:07 Mmmmm.... spicy chili.

8:12 Oooooooowwww...... spicy chili.

8:12 Need water.

8:13 More water. More water. More water. More water. Water. Water. Water. Water. Water. Water.

8:26 I think it’s illegal for “Two Broke Girls” and the word “spectacular’ to be included in the same sentence. Also, “Pour Some Sugar On Me” was playing over the entire commercial. These NFL Playoffs have served as a pretty sizable renaissance for Def Leppard. Also, nobody under the age of 30 got that reference.

8:29 I just realized that in two hours, the season will be over. That’s it. No more football until September. I’m legitimately sad about this. Almost as sad as when I realized that Jerome Boger shaved his moustache.

8:33 Here comes the second half....

8:34 And there goes Jacoby Jones! 28-6 Baltimore after a 109 yard kickoff return touchdown. Bad tackling by San Francisco. Jones just darted right through the middle of the San Fran coverage team and took a straight line right to the end zone. This game is almost done, but I feel obligated to stick it out to the end.

8:39 And the power has gone out at the Super Bowl! This Super Bowl will forever be known as The Night the Lights Went Out in New Orleans. How awesome would it be if Shawne Merriman were on hand to do the Lights Out dance?

8:43 Roger Goodell had to spend four days in New Orleans, which has become his own personal Hell after the bounty punishments. And now the power goes out. I think he’s having a heart attack as we speak. Goodell has been cursed by New Orleans voodoo.

8:50 This is embarrassing. How does the NFL let this happen at their premier event? Now, all anyone will talk about in the morning is that the lights went out at the Super Bowl. I thought about inserting a Buffalo Wild Wings reference here, but I have some shreds of dignity remaining

8:59 New movie idea: And Then There Was Darkness: Revenge of the Bounty Saints

The Plot: Jonathan Vilma, Scott Fujita, James Harrison, and every anti-Goodell player conspire to sabotage the Super Bowl. They pay off the electric crew to not show up and hire Andy Reid, Norv Turner, Jason Garrett, and Pat Shurmur to mismanage the power grid. It would all lead off to one final showdown between Goodell and the players. If Quentin Tarantino’s interested, I offer this screenplay free of charge.

9:10 When’s the power coming back? When’s the power coming back? When’s the power coming back? When’s the power coming back? When’s the power coming back? When’s the power coming back? When’s the power coming back? When’s the power coming back?

9:11 And after a thirty-odd minute delay, the power is back. San Francisco immediately punts the ball. Also, the electrical equipment on the Ravens’ sideline apparently never went out. It was all of the Niners’ sideline equipment that wouldn’t function. And really, that’s the entire night in a nutshell.

9:18 The Niners haven’t been playing that badly so far. In fact, they’ve managed to put together a few decent sequences. But the Ravens have come up with just about every single big play in this game. The kickoff return, the two turnovers, the long pass before the half, it’s all working in Baltimore’s favor. Kaepernick has managed to fit in some nice throws to Vernon Davis and Michael Crabtree, but the Niners haven’t been able to finish those drives.

9:24 Of course, the Niners score a touchdown right after I finish writing that last entry. Kaepernick fired a pass to Michael Crabtree on an intermediate out, and then he ran into the endzone after both Bernard Pollard and Carry Williams went for hits instead of tackles. Both of them smashed into Crabtree, who stayed on his feet and ran into the endzone. This is a huge pet peeve of mine: players who hit instead of making fundamentally sound tackles. It leads to a ton of sloppy plays. 28-13 Ravens with half of the third left.

9:30 The Ravens go three and out after Joe Flacco is bulldozed by Aldon Smith. Left tackle Bryant McKinnie just stood there like a statue while Smith blew right past him and introduced Flacco to the turf. Samuel Koch then shanked a punt to Ted Ginn, who bounced outside of his blockers and returned it to the Ravens’ 20 yard line. Here come the Niners.

9:34 Touchdown San Francisco! It’s 28-20 Baltimore after a five yard touchdown run from Frank Gore. Great play design by San Francisco: Kaepernick took the snap and handed the ball off to Frank Gore, who was standing to his left.. Gore then ran to his right behind the pulling left guard and bounced into the endzone. This game has totally changed. San Francisco is getting big plays and pounding the Ravens at the line again. FIve minutes left in the third.

9:40 Oh. My. God.

9:40 FUMBLE!!!!!!! Joe Flacco threw a swing pass to Ray Rice, who had the ball knocked out of his hands by Tarell Brown. Niners recover at the Baltimore 27. I’m beyond the point of believing this.

9:42 Niners are forced to kick a field goal after a pass to Ted Ginn in the endzone fails. Randy Moss ran a go route up the seam right beside Ginn, the idea being that Moss should draw the deep safety towards him and give Ginn a 1v1 matchup with Corey Graham. However, Williams recognized the concept and didn’t bite on it. He ran over and batted the ball away from Ginn just in time. 28-23 Baltimore with a few minutes left in the third.

9:50 Nice drive from the Ravens here. Baltimore is on the Niners’ 18 at the end of the third quarter. Also, best commercial of the night: the “Leon Sandcastle” commercial. Essentially, Deion Sanders assumes the identity of Leon Sandcastle to get back into football, and it’s just him with an afro. Gotta love Primetime Sanders. Also, I already called dibs on “Leon Sandcastle” for my next fantasy football team name.

9:56 Field goal is good for Baltimore! 31-23 Baltimore with thirteen minutes left in the fourth quarter. Still a one score game, though. Also, the fact that Baltimore didn’t go for it from two yards away is probably causing Grantland’s Bill Barnwell to drop-kick his TV.

10:02 Kaepernick just slung a perfectly thrown ball to Randy Moss on a deep corner route for a 32 yard gain. Bad times for Baltimore.They need to take Leon Sandcastle in the next draft.

10:05 Touchdown San Francisco! In the time that it took me to write the previous entry, LaMichael James busted off a 30 yard run and Colin Kaepernick ran outside the tackles for a fifteen yard touchdown. It was an inside rush and all of the receivers were deep down the field, so there was nobody to stop Kaepernick once he got outside the tackles. The Niners did not get the two point conversion, so they’re still down 31-29 with ten minutes left. Still, the script has almost completely flipped in one quarter. Just as we talk about The Catch and The Drive, future generations of Niners fans will refer to this game as The Blackout.

10:15 Incredibly dumb challenge by Jim Harbaugh. The Ravens converted a second and seven just short of midfield, and Jim Harbaugh is challenging to say that it should be third and inches instead. So if he wins, the Ravens’ chance of continuing the drive goes from 100% to 95%. If he loses, the Ravens get a first down that they would have gotten anyway and the Niners lose a timeout. Even though the Niners won the challenge, it was still such a dumb move. Once again, Bill Barnwell is having a heart attack.

10:18 Shocker: Ravens ended up converting the third down on a big fade route to Torrey Smith. Baltimore is currently on the Niners’ 20 yard line with 4:28 left and third and two to go for a first.

10:21 Field goal for Baltimore. Justin Tucker punches through a 38 yard field goal to give the Ravens a 34-29 lead with four minutes and fifteen seconds left. The fact that this is still even a game is nothing short of astounding. I love football so much.

10:24 Niners have the ball with four minutes left down by five. The Ravens have no speed whatsoever up front and they no longer have Haloti Ngata to jam the middle. Kaepernick can run and do all of the wacky pistol formations that he wants in this situation.

10:28 Frank Gore just took a shotgun draw and bounced it outside for a big gain down to the five yard line. The Niners have second and goal on the seven yard line at the two minute warning down 34-29. Everything that has happened throughout the course of this book and this season has led up to these moments.

10:32 Kaepernick fires incomplete on second and goal. He was rolling out to his right and the defense all flowed the same way. Tight coverage forced the incompletion.

10:34 Fourth and goal after another incompletion on third down. This is it......

10:35 INCOMPLETE!

10:36 Ravens have the ball with 1:42 left and have the ball at second and eight from their own seven yard line.

10:40 Ravens go three and out. They’ll punt the ball from inside their own ten yard line with twelve seconds left on the clock.

10:41 Sam Koch takes the snap and kills eight seconds before running out of bounds. The Niners get the safety and the score is 34-31 Ravens with four seconds left. Good thinking by Koch: the Niners were caught napping by that play. Nobody rushed the punter from the outside and Koch could just stand there with the football, thereby killing clock. Four seconds left and the Ravens are up 34-31 on the Niners. Free kick upcoming.

10:45 And the Ravens have won the Super Bowl! Baltimore 34, San Francisco 31.

Well, that’s it. What you have just read was the NFL season, from beginning to end. The draft, the season, the playoffs, it has all lead up to this moment. This perfect moment of closure. The confetti falls, the Lombardi Trophy is presented, the MVP goes to Disney World, and you can’t help but feel like this is how things were supposed to end. And with the end of the season comes the end of this book. You probably read this book in a few weeks. Or over months. Or skimmed it to read just the parts you wanted to read. But for me, this has been a project that has lasted three-fourths of one year. My season-long chat with you, the reader, has ended. Now, the lights go out not just in the SuperDome, but in stadiums all across the country. The fields fall silent. Moves will be made in the offseason. Picks will be traded, prospects will be evaluated, and teams will be sculpted anew. Then training camp will come again. And come September, the fields will spring to life once more. Until then, we wait for this uniquely American cycle to begin again. So as the NFL signs off for the year, I too will finally sign off on this book. Thank you for reading, and may future seasons be kind to your team. Unless, of course, you’re a Patriots fan.

·      

   BACK COVER: ENDORSEMENTS

Without a doubt, the best book I’ve ever written. -Andrew Goldstein

Great story. Compelling and rich. -San Diego anchorman Ron Burgundy

(*Grumble*) Fantastic. I’m gonna go back to sleep.- Andrew’s friend Ray after hearing of his plans to write a book at 7:00 A.M. on the morning bus

That was an awesome book. I know way more about football now. -You after reading this book.

       DEDICATIONS: REGULAR

This book has two dedication sections because there are two distinct groups of people that need to be mentioned before this book can proceed. The first section covers most of the people that authors usually thank in dedications. So, here goes.

Thank you to all of my former, current, and future teachers for humoring me when I did book reports on “Tales from the Jets’ Sideline” and sometimes pretending not to see me when I read the Football Outsiders’ Almanac during class. Most importantly, I took something away from each class that made me want to pursue this project. In an indirect (and in some cases direct) way, you guys allowed this dream to come true. All of the teachers I had during my Junior year were very reasonable with homework/grades/etc, and that was much appreciated throughout the process. Special thanks go out to teachers who taught me in my younger years for teaching me to write, dealing with my abominable penmanship, and once again, for letting me get three solid book reports out of “Tales from the Jets’ Sideline.”

Thank you to all of my friends, who were a huge help to the book whether they know it or not. I’d often run certain ideas and sections by them before committing it to paper, and they’ve given me some good tips on things to write. Also, thanks for making my school years more awesome. Special thanks go out to Matt, Ray, and Liam for the tons of football conversations we’ve had over the years. Matt, I might have never noticed that my English teacher looked like Johnny Depp without you in my class. Liam, thanks for guessing the gambling lines with Ray and me every Friday. And Ray, thanks for trying to prevent me from going into all out Skip Bayless mode over Nick Foles in Week 5. I ultimately couldn’t be saved, but it was a good attempt anyways.

Thank you to my publisher, KidPub, for being extremely agreeable during the publishing process. There aren’t a lot of publishing firms that would let my book see the light of day, but KidPub gives so many young authors that chance. It’s a noble thing to do and I can’t thank them enough for working with me on this project.

Thank you to every single resource out there that made it easier to do my job. A full list of the content that was viewed to write this monstrosity can be found at the back of the book. Please keep in mind that I’m listing sites and whatnot instead of the actual article names, but I think (or at least I hope) that I was pretty good about listing specific article names inside the sections where I reference them. Special thanks go out to the fine folks at Football Outsiders and grantland.com for making this book so much better than it would have been had you not existed.

Thank you to everybody who gave me my first few chances in what will hopefully be a long and fulfilling career covering football. I’d like to thank Jeremy Treatman, Steve Goldstein, Adam Balk, and everybody else from Sports Broadcasting Camps that showed me it was possible to get paid to talk about football. You guys will never be far from my thoughts and I cherish every friendship that I made there. Thank you very much to Paul Jolovitz, Dave Goucher, John Celestand, Kenny Albert, and every other broadcaster that came into speak to us at SBC. I’ll never forget it. (Also, if you’re in the greater Philly area and hear Jolovitz on 610 WIP, call in and ask to hear his Lou Holtz impression. You will not be disappointed.) Thank you to Tom Hicks, Michael Signora, and Greg Aiello from the NFL’s communications department for answering some questions that I had about the industry and about where to find some good sources. You were helpful in more ways than you know. Finally, thank you to Gary Gramling and everyone at SIKIDS for giving me my first real platform by way of the Kid Reporters’ Program. It’s a great program and I highly encourage kids who are sports fans to apply for it and/or subscribe to the magazine. I still remember reading those Buzz Beamer cartoons like it was yesterday.

I want to thank you, the reader, for buying this book. You’re probably one of a couple dozen who did.

And finally, thank you to everyone in my family. I learned football in my grandparents’ living room, wrote most of this book at the encouragement of my parents, and had meaningful football conversations with my uncles that helped add some crucial observations to this book. So, I’d like to thank (deep breath)  Mom, Dad, Roscoe, Grandma, Grandpa, Aunt Jodi, Uncle Jamer, Aunt Ilyana, Uncle Ray, my little cousins Victoria, Mitchell, Russell, and Chris, Aunt Carol, Aunt Evelyn, Uncle Pat, Aunt Jackie, Uncle Glenn, Aunt Trish, Uncle Casey, my other Uncle Pat, my Aunt Anna, my Uncle Kevin, and my Cousin Johnny. (Gasping for air). Seriously, though, thanks for every family gathering over the years. Christmas dinner at Aunt Evelyn’s house is one of the best days of my year.

There are four people (and one dog) that I would like to give a special thanks to. My dog Roscoe has always been a source of constant amusement and happiness. When you’re writing a 600 odd page book, you start smashing your head against the desk by about page 375. Luckily, I had Roscoe to take for long walks and play ball with.

Mom and Dad have always been my biggest fans. Dad has been hyping my book to every single person he’s met since I started writing it. He’s the first one that implored me to learn to write well, and I feel like I’m a better person because of it. Thanks, Pops. And I would be remiss (trust me, very, very, VERY, remiss) if I forgot my Mom. She taught me the value of learning and always found unique ways to extract the best out of me. Thanks, Mom. Ultimately, I can never fully repay them for everything they’ve done for me. But come to think of it, emptying the dishwasher would be a start.

And finally, thank you to my grandma and grandpa for spoiling me throughout my childhood and always being there for me no matter what. They got me into football and I never got out of it. Grandpa was diagnosed with prostate cancer right before work on this book began, so I would once again be remiss if I didn’t give him a special mention in this section. This book’s for you, Gramps.

       DEDICATIONS: SPECIAL

I wanted to make a separate, special dedication to everyone whose lives were greatly affected by Hurricane Sandy. This storm was especially personal for me because I live about 45 minutes away from the areas that were hardest hit. I have lived near Princeton for most of my life, but the Jersey Shore is practically my second home during the Summer. I crawled on the sand at Point Pleasant before I could walk. My favorite restaurant is Franky’s Bar and Grill, which is two or three minutes away from the ocean in Point Pleasant. A significant portion of my childhood is on the beaches that were hardest hit by Sandy, and I felt like I should do something to help.

I came to the conclusion that I should half of this book’s proceeds to the NJ Sandy Relief Fund. It’s going “well beyond the initial stages of cleanup” and will actively work to restore the infrastructure destroyed by Sandy. It’s the least I can do to say “thank you” to an area and a group of people that have given me so much over the years. I love the beach, but most of all, I love the state of New Jersey. It’s the only place that I have ever called my childhood home, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I would implore you to continue sending in donations to the NJ Sandy Relief Fund. There’s a common misconception that once the Red Cross moves out of the disaster area, everything is suddenly fine. Having seen the photos of the devastation up and down the New Jersey coast as well as having visited multiple times since then, I can tell you that this is untrue. There are still a lot of people that might never fully rebuild from this storm without your help. Go to https://sandynjrelieffund.org/index.html to donate. Thank you, and now let’s dive in to the 2012 NFL Season.

           SOURCES

Wikipedia.com: Yes, (Insert Teacher’s Name here), Wikipedia is a perfectly viable source. This was mostly used for stats and basic facts, such as what round a player was drafted in and height/weight.

ESPN.com/NFL.com: I read hundreds of articles from these websites over the nine month period that I wrote this book. I also used these for some slightly advanced stats, such as turnover ratio and sacks allowed in a season by certain teams. I also used them for things like upcoming schedules and rosters.

Football Outsiders: This is probably the website that was the biggest help to me throughout the course of this book. It taught me to pay more attention to the offensive line and introduced me to a number of meaningful advanced stats, such as Catch Percentage, DVOA, and blown blocks. Audibles at the Line, Word of Muth, and Quick Reads were especially helpful articles that I looked at every week. My book would not be nearly what it is without them, and I highly recommend that other people go check them out.

Grantland: I read just about every significant football article that was published on grantland.com from May 2012 to February 2013. I loved every single one of Bill Barnwell’s columns, and they gave me a unique perspective on the game that was extremely helpful for that week’s column. Of course, Bill Simmons’ weekly mailbag picks column was always an awesome read and the best way ever to kick off a weekend. I also listened to every episode of the B.S. Report that involved the NFL from May 2012 to February 2013. The ones that feature Michael Lombardi, Aaron Schatz, and Cousin Sal are especially fantastic podcasts that made the morning bus rides bearable.

ProFootballReference.com: This was mostly used for advanced statistics about certain players. For instance, that’s the place to go if you want to find obscure franchise records or how many comeback wins Josh Freeman has in his career so far. Great site.

Other Sites- There were a ton of other websites that went into the making of this book, most of which are not quoted. I read various newspaper websites and sports blogs from around the country just to get a sense for what people in that city thought of certain things going on around the NFL. For instance, I read RG3 articles on the Washington Post’s website just to form a more complete opinion about him. When I did end up quoting one of these sites, I always inserted the source into the section. Also, I would like to mention the Bleacher Report in this section. I didn’t use them as a be-all, end-all source because I know that anybody can write for them. And I certainly don’t recommend that other people use it as a primary source because a ton of their content is tailored to page views. However, they do have some qualified writers (known as “featured columnists”) with interesting opinions that I took into account while writing the book.

Youtube- I watched hundreds and hundreds of Youtube clips over the course of this book. It was especially useful for looking up old games and highlight packages that were put together a couple of years ago. It also helped me notice new things about players. For instance, one Youtube user named FIVESTARTITAN posts a compilation of the best runs at the end of each year. I viewed those and was able to get a better picture for what the best parts of certain running backs were. I also downloaded and watched every episode of NFL Gameday Final from 2007, 2009, 2010, and 2011. I caught up on any game that I could not see due to homework or other obligations on nfl.com.

Books- There are two books in particular that have made this venture possible. Pat Kirwan’s Take Your Eye Off the Ball is a fantastic guide to every position in the league. It allowed me to say with more authority what a defensive end does in a 3-4 as opposed to a 4-3, for instance. The other book that was immensely helpful is the 2012 Pro Football Almanac from Football Outsiders. I usually read about ten pages a day from it (as I called it: my daily reading of scripture), and I was able to amass a lot of information. Whether my brain remembers all of it is an entirely different story, but I certainly thank Football Outsiders for putting that book out there.

NFL Sunday Ticket/NFL RedZone Channel- These were my methods of viewing primary source material every Sunday. Also, NFL Game Cuts was super helpful. Essentially, NFL Game Cuts is each play run one after the other with no commercial interruption. You can view a game that you missed in thirty minutes. It was also good for dissecting a game and picking up on certain teams’ tendencies.

Facebook and Twitter- I subscribed to roughly three dozen football related news feeds on Facebook and about eighty on Twitter. One newsfeed that deserves special recognition is Adam Schefter’s. He always posts interesting stats and up to date info about injuries and whatnot. I systematically plundered his newsfeed to use for my “Odds and Defensive Ends” section. I like to think I’m paying him back by potentially giving him up to twelve new subscribers from this book.

BACK COVER SYNOPSIS

Join Andrew Goldstein as he takes you along for a journey through a year in the National Football League. Not only can you look back on your favorite moments from the season, but you’ll also learn a ton of new things about the game and get some helpful analysis on the players that dominate national headlines. Plus, half of the proceeds for this book go towards rebuilding the New Jersey beaches from Hurricane Sandy. So buy the book, pat yourself on the back for supporting a great cause, make yourself an Old Fashioned (or pour yourself a root beer if you’re under 21), and enjoy the Football Volumes.

      

AUTHOR BIO

Andrew Goldstein is a High School junior from Cranbury, New Jersey. He has written for SIKIDS and has done incalculable amounts of prestigious reporting in his imagination. He decided to write a book on that mid-May day because it seemed fun. He clearly had no idea what he was getting into. He might be that only seventeen year old whose hairline has already started to recede. But he had fun writing the book and it was totally worth every moment...... right?